Aquaslash

A comedy/horror set in a graduation party at a water park, which is not funny, scary, exciting, interesting, or even a slasher. Watch something else.

The occasional use of slow-motion at key points allows us to savor the gory gags and well-done prosthetics work. If only the director and writer had put as much thought into the rest of their film.

It plays like an extended segment from a Final Destination film. Even at just over hour, the story is stretched thinner than the girls' bikini straps.

It looks great, but is ultimately confusing, outdated and commits the cardinal sin of horror movies - you don't care if any of them die.

Sporadic laughs and a mercifully brief length aren't enough to compensate for a disappointing lack of aquatic slashing.

Fun, frolics, and frights await those that seek out Aquaslash. But be prepared for a long wait before the thrill ride begins.

This summertime bummer can't even live up to water-park-horror classics such as [checks notes] Piranha 3DD.