Beastly

You go, Doog!

Beauty And The Beast except with the lusty, gothic menace that makes that story interesting replaced by moany teenagers and crap acoustic guitar music. Or, in short, Dawson's Freak.

'Beastly' is a special brand of hogwash: a fairy tale that preaches inner beauty while refusing to obscure the looks of its doomed hero.

In every aspect, from story to tone to characterization to visual aesthetic, it's laughably perfunctory, as though everyone involved were too embarrassed to give it more than a half-ironic token effort.

Beneath it all, however, is a movie with a good heart.

Beastly does not aspire to compete with its prestigious ancestors, rather it aims to entertain the young women its catered to. [Full review in Spanish]

Good messages in an uneven movie that has some very effective moments early on but gets more ridiculous as the credits approach.

Beastly is made precisely for those people who will enter the movie theater not 100% sure that the film is a retelling of the "Beauty & The Beast" storyline.

The story is so contrived it's almost physically painful. Everything is laughably bad, everything. But somewhere along the line, I found myself emotionally invested in this syrupy nonsense on the screen.