Fantastic Four: Rise of the Silver Surfer

An off-brand superhero movie, the cinematic equivalent of one of those generic breakfast cereals with a badly drawn squirrel for a mascot.

The film's effects people perform many miracles, from draining the River Thames to ensuring that the Thing produces a convincing smile. But one thing they can't do is to make the unfailingly wholesome Mr Fantastic and friends worth worrying about.

Rise of the Silver Surfer is both relentlessly dull and curiously bombastic.

The performances are plywooden, the cornball visual gags are groanworthy, and Tim Story still can't direct his way out a sack with a map.

It's funnier and splashier than the original, but I still can't quite recommend it.

The first movie's genesis story was more fun than the perfunctory doomsday scheme trotted out here.

A scattergun sequel that makes the franchise feel tired, two films in.

So many ridiculous concepts and ideas surface in this film.

Rise of the Silver Surfer is a step in the right direction, but that doesn't make me eager for another chapter.

At ninety-minutes, the movie whizzes along efficiently and isn't around long enough to really overstay its welcome, which also ends up playing to its advantage.