Mighty Morphin Power Rangers: The Movie

Obnoxiously loud and busy, it drips with goo and slime and contains an exhausting amount of action, funny voices and snot jokes.

The Rangers themselves are so painfully bland.

It's easy to see why the Rangers are popular. Even before they magically morph, the kids are sky-diving, roller-blading and living without parental authority. And they kick serious butt. But it's all done quite unhumorously.

It's short on originality but long on hustle, gymnastics and lavender goo.

Mighty Morphin Power Rangers is an utterly depersonalized thrill machine, yet it's exactly the film's go-go relentlessness that is likely to make boys and girls eat it up.

Some of the dialogue is difficult to hear over the din of the explosions and the hard-rock musical score. Fortunately, actions speak louder, and more eloquently, than words throughout Power Rangers: The Movie.

Mighty Morphin Power Rangers is kind of a mixed bag - a Frankenstein. Some things are genuinely bad, while others are actually pretty good. In between, there are those moments that are so bad they become good all over again.

As a grown man, I'm not sure why I watched this. It was fun when I was a kid but not now.

This was completely bonkers. Jason David Frank gave it a 110% though.

It's a tiresome debate.