Welcome to Mooseport

For Ray Romano fans only.

Clunkily earthbound as its characters and the situations plod forward while never getting anywhere.

This movie telegraphs its moves from the beginning, each of its laughs calculated as if an accounting firm had prepared them using a spreadsheet and an abacus.

It's a snooze on every level.

Devoid of wit and point.

Means to satirize the TV-fueled carnivalesque nature of American electoral politics but only demonstrates the TV-fueled debasement of American commercial comedy.

Comes off less like a feature film than a failed sitcom pilot.

Welcome--now get out.

Whose story is this? Nobody's. We don't know whom we're meant to root for...

This lackluster production fails to generate much in the way of tension and less in the way of merriment.